“Like Eating Chocolate”: A Discussion on Positive Gender Experiences with Dr. Will Beischel

Have you ever thought about how your gender might make you feel good? Gender can help bring out joy and happiness in ways you might not realize! I interviewed Dr. Will Beischel (they/them), an Assistant Professor of Social Psychology at Loyola University Chicago. They research and teach about gender and sexuality, especially the positive aspects of LGBTQ+ life and how people’s identities are shaped developmentally by their social experiences. Let’s jump in and learn more about these positive gender experiences!  

What is gender pleasure?

Dr. Beischel studies a concept called gender pleasure, which is a psychological term for the positive feelings or experiences people have about their gender. Gender pleasure can cover a wide range of positive feelings, like “joy, euphoria, and connection, but also kind of quieter emotions like peace and contentment.” Dr. Beishel described it like “eating chocolate, right, it induces pleasure.” 

They highlight three different ways people may experience gender pleasure, at the individual, interpersonal, and societal levels. At the individual level, people might self-affirm their gender through behaviors like dancing or gardening, or by how they dress and change their appearance, such as with makeup or clothing. At the interpersonal level, people may feel gender pleasure from others in their life, affirming their gender, whether it is strangers, friends, family, or romantic partners. At the societal level, pleasure might come from either conforming or not conforming to gender norms. As Dr. Beischel explains, “My participants sometimes talk about going against gender norms as feeling really fun. Being able to break out of the box is an uplifting experience for a lot of people, especially if they have been oppressed by that box. But going along with norms can matter, too.” Gender pleasure can also be uniquely affected by systems of power, such as racism and ableism. For example, Dr. Beischel found in their research that communities that center both LGBTQ+ people and people of color can help bring out feelings of gender pleasure for LGBTQ+ people of color. Being in these spaces can provide a sense of social safety and belonging that might not be found elsewhere. Ultimately, anyone can experience gender pleasure in ways that are often unique to each person.

Why is gender pleasure important?

Dr. Beischel began their research on gender pleasure as a response to the large amount of research in the social sciences that focuses on the negative experiences of LGBTQ+ people, such as sexism, transphobia, and gender dysphoria. While this research is important, Dr. Beischel points out how they, “saw this disconnect between the literature and what was evident in my community, and I thought that was a big problem, scientifically, because we are missing out on such a huge part of the picture if we don’t understand these positive experiences.” 

These experiences of gender pleasure are important, since they are often denied to LGBTQ+ people, who can face negative attitudes because of not fitting into gender norms. Dr. Beischel discusses how negative experiences make people feel “ashamed to be who [they] are, like [they] should be different, or that there is something wrong with [them].” They go on to explain how gender pleasure can actually help LGTBQ+ people deal with these messages, stating that, “These positive experiences of affirmation are kind of a balm for those harms, in that they show us that [we] can actually find great joy in being exactly who [we are]. And I think that can be quite beautiful.”

How can we foster gender pleasure?

Gender pleasure can sometimes be difficult to notice, as Dr. Beischel explains, because people are often not taught how to recognize these positive experiences. Part of this reason is because there isn’t much research on joyful, positive experiences regarding gender. As Dr. Beischel discusses, “Only talking about the negative aspects of trans and queer life, and gender more broadly, might make it seem that this is the only kind of experience that gender can bring. That might lead to further stigma of marginalized communities, so I wanted to show that actually these communities are very creative and finding ways to find joy and contentment within systems that are often set up to oppress them.” 

By learning more about gender pleasure and with more research on it, people can better understand their positive gender experiences and learn how to foster them. Affirming others’ gender and being open-minded can also help, as Dr. Beischel explains, “If someone is trying something new out, encourage them, be there for them, support them. I think less policing of each other’s gender is going to help people find what feels good for them.” Ultimately, these positive experiences can be “lifesaving,” as Dr. Beischel describes, and can help people embrace who they are. Dr. Beischel aims to continue further research to better understand these meaningful experiences! 

 

Recommended Reading: 

Beischel, W. J., Mao, J., Irwin, J. A., & van Anders, S. M. (2024). Gender pleasure and minoritized gender/sex/ual experiences. Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity.

Freshley, A., Beischel, W. J., Gormezano, A. M., Mao, J., Shuchat, D., & van Anders, S. M. (2024). “Gender expectations can be stifling but gender expressions can be liberating”: Gender/sex/ual majority individuals’ accounts of gender pleasure. Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity.